The pajama sets have been put away and a new year for singles and couples alike has begun. Love is a wonderful thing. It is the selfless action given and received. It’s the one thing everyone needs and desires to live a life filled with joy. Love is multidimensional. It is forgiving. It is kind. It is patient. It changes. People go through life and relationships with the desire to give and experience love at its core, but people often fail to realize that with time and different experiences, love changes. And it should. As the New Year begins, many look forward to starting their lives with a familiar love from a different aspect of their relationship, fresh love, refurbished love, or self-love. No matter what kind of love you’re currently experiencing or expecting to experience, it should refresh your heart, mind and spirit in every conceivable way. If you’re looking for ways to change, maintain or renew your love life, whether you’re single or in a relationship, take a look at the list below to discover how you can create the love you need.
Learn the art of self-love. There are so many ways you can show yourself love. The first step would be to emotionally connect with who you are. Acknowledge your thoughts and feelings. Take them into account, describe them and identify the root of them. Emotionally connecting with yourself is one of many ways we open ourselves to understanding who we are from our own perspective. This also allows you to dig deeper into yourself and allows you to love yourself more. Other ways to indulge in self-love include giving yourself grace, setting and honoring your boundaries, learning the art of saying no, treating yourself with respect and high regard. Self-love, loving yourself is key to having healthy relationships. There is no way you can possibly love anyone else if you don’t know what love looks like for yourself.
If you are in a relationship, and you want to renew the love, take some time with your partner to reflect on the good and the bad things that occurred during the previous year. Have this honest, and loving conversation with your mate on a date night. Listen attentively to each other, take note and make changes as you both see fit to move forward.
Another way to renew love in your relationship is to show your appreciation for your partner. You can do this by beginning a love jar. Starting on Black Love Day, Valentines Day or your anniversary date write out one thing you love about your mate and place it in the jar. Anytime your partner does something to make you smile, write it down and place it there. If you live in separate spaces, have a jar at each other’s places and fill them up! You can put something in daily, weekly or monthly. At the end of the year, or on a special occasion open the jar and read your love statements to each other. This will allow you to remember why you’re together and what you love about each other. If you aren’t in a relationship, you can create a love jar for yourself to remind you of all of the good things that make you the person you are.
If you’re single, by choice or force, take some time to map out what love looks like for you. Create a relationship/love vision board. Write down everything you want and need from love, place it on a beautifully decorated board and position it in a place that is personal and private. As the year progresses, be sure to change or add anything you see fit to make sure you manifest the love you deserve. Once you’ve identified what love looks like for you, be open to receiving it. Leave all past hurts behind and take a step towards the love you want. If you’re struggling with healing from a past or recent break up then give yourself healing grace before you move forward too fast. You don’t want someone taking advantage of your vulnerability before you have the chance to heal.
Love is patient. It is kind. It does not envy. It is forgiving. As you renew and confirm love for yourself and others this year, be sure to be patient, be kind, forgive and and look inward at who you are and what you have and be thankful for it. As the months and seasons change, so will the love you give, receive and desire. Embrace it all. You’ll be surprised at the things you’ll discover about this thing called love.
Liz Lampkin is a lifestyle, love and relationships writer. Follow her on social media @Liz_Lampkin.